| 1 funny comment(s) ]

i NEED a brain washer + heart washer!!!

I don't wanna remember people whom I shouldn't remember or miss. I don't wanna think of them any more. I don't wanna keep their images in my brain and heart. I wish I never met them. If I could have chosen, I would have chosen to go a different way. I would have chosen to be in a different school. I would have refused when my mom tried to make me enrolling into that school. I would have chosen to be in a different class. I would have done anything I could to stop myself from the eternal pain I am having!!!

How could one be so
mean to me while I am so serious and sincere in every way? Someone please help me understand ... Is this supposed to be another lesson in life that I gotta learn by myself???

I feel like being played with, being surrounded, trapped, confused, even used somehow!!! I was born a strong fighter, how could I be so weak now???

This is not me!!! No, it's not!! It must be a miserable soul that was trapped in my body.
That boy might be irresistible to you, poor little soul, but to me he ain't that important now that I have analysed everything. So please release me from this pain you are creating to both of us! It's been 11 years, ain't this time the right time to let go off everything in the past???!!!

I'm scared by the thought of
being used to satisfy a selfish person's need!!! I'm scared by the thought of people coming to me because they want something from me!!! It's horrible to think about the existence of fake friendliness that people are showing because I can bring some mental or physical benefits to them!!!

Things have turned out to be negative for me at the moment. I'm disgusted by the sudden change in level of closeness that people are sending out to me. They can be so damn easy and they can talk about EVERYTHING to me. Then suddenly, they turn 180 degrees and being cold ass(es). I can't stand that, maybe it's because I AM NOT LIKE THAT!!!

Oh well, what can I say, life is full of surprises. Let's think of each surprise as a gift! I'm thankful for knowing more things than yesterday, no matter what it is that I just discovered! At the end of the day, I will be smiling my most beautiful smile which could shatter anyone's heart. Haha! I think I'm being too positive now I can be paranoid!!!

Sad opening, but happy ending, that's not bad for a post hey?! :)


1 funny comment(s)

Balazs Kanyasi said... @ 7 December 2010 at 19:30


I like this post and pic. :-)

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