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Where does marriage fit into the lifestyle of an animal species that has a biologically promiscuous male?

Promiscuity is wired into a man's brain and is a legacy of his evolutionary past. Throughout human history, wars greatly diminished the numbers of men so it made sense to add to the size of the tribe as often as possible. The number of men returning from battle was usually lower than at the start. This meant that there was always a large number of widows, so creating a harem for the returning males was an effective survival strategy for the tribe.

Giving birth to boys was seen as a wonderful event because additional males were always needed to defend the community. Girls were a disappointment because the tribe invariably had an excess of females. This is the way it was for hundreds of thousands of years. In addition, modern man is still equipped with a large hypothalamus and enormous amounts of testosterone to fulfill his ancient urge to procreate. The reality is that men, like most primates and other mammals, are not biologically inclined to complete monogamy.

The huge male-oriented sex industry offers pertinent proof. Practically all pornography, erotic videos, prostitution and X-rated Internet images are directed at men, showing that while most men can live in a monogamous relationship, their brain wiring demands polygamous mental stimulation. It has to be understood, however, that in discussing men's urge to be promiscuous, we are talking about biological inclinations. We are not promoting promiscuous behaviour or providing men with an excuse for infidelity. We live today in a world that is completely different to that of our past, and our own biology is often completely at odds with our expectations and demands.

Human biology is
dangerously out of date.

The fact that something may be instinctive or natural doesn't mean that it's good for us. The brain circuitry of a moth gives it an instinctive attraction towards bright lights and this allows the moth to navigate at night using the stars and the moon. Unfortunately, the modern moth is also living in a world that is dramatically different to the one in which it evolved. We now have moth and mosquito zappers. By doing what is natural and instinctive, the modern moth flies into the zapper and is incinerated instantly. In understanding their biological urges, modern men have a choice of avoiding self-incineration as a result of doing what comes naturally.

There's a small percentage of women who are as promiscuous as men, but their motivation is usually different to that of men. To be turned on sexually, the brain circuity of the nest-defending human female responds to a range of criteria other than just the promise of sex.

Most women want a relationship or at least the possibility of some emotional connection before they feel the desire for sex. Most men don't realise that once a woman feels an emotional bond has been created, she will happily bonk his brains out for the next three to six months. With the exception of the rare percentage of nymphomaniacs, most women feel the strongest urge for physical sex during ovulation which can last several days or several hours.

If unrestrained, most men would fall into a bottomless pit of mindless fornication to guarantee survival of the tribe. A survey conducted by the American Health Institute showed that 82% of boys aged 16-19 said they liked the idea of participating in an orgy with strangers, while only 2% (two percent) of girls felt the same. The rest found the idea appalling.

A woman wants lots of sex with the
man she loves. A man wants lots of sex.

[Source: Why men don't listen and woman can't read maps by Allan + Barbara Pease]

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